Bizarre Murder Weapons | Christina Eubanks and Sir Reginald Hemsley-Doddingdale
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Episode 12
One thing we know about murder is that people will work with what they’ve got! It’s not all guns and knives, sometimes seemingly harmless everyday objects can be turned into a murder weapon. But unconventional weapons does add a layer of mystery and confusion to a case. And in some cases, inevitable puns and jokester headlines. But it’s not all shits and giggles…
After today, you’ll never look at that piece of stale bread in your kitchen with the same eyes 👀. And your toilet seat? Watch that sneaky little biatch.
Brandon is kicking us off with a story titled “Porcelain Rage.” Which immediately brings a porcelain doll to mind (cue those creepy ass stories of baby dolls killing people in their sleep), but it’s actually the porcelain you find in the bathroom. Christina Eubanks, a 28 year old woman from Tennessee, was suddenly targeted by her pizza guy/drug dealer. You might initially laugh at the fact that it was a toilet seat murder, but this is a gruesome story. Ultimately, it’s not funny at all and viewer discretion is advised.
Kevin’s story on the other hand is the subject of laughs purely because we know so little about it that it’s borderline ridiculous. Reginald Hemsley-Doddingdale, a man with the most British name you’ve ever heard, was killed by a stale load of Pumperknickle bread. The translation of Pumperknickle? The Devil’s Fart. This man was killed…by the devil’s fart.
Resources and References
Learn more about Christina Eubanks:
Learn more about Sir Reginald Hemsley-Doddingdale:
Why Is It Called New Scotland Yard? How the Met Police Got It’s Nickname
The Story of the English Man Who Was Beaten to Death with a Piece of Bread
Transcript:
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (00:01.814)
Brian, do you want to do any of this opening?
Brandon (00:04.954)
Well, do you want me to say what today's episode is on? Do you want to do it the same way we did it yesterday or you want me to do?
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (00:11.938)
Well, I can do my, like, my story can be described as one word, but you start and then you go, Kevin, what's yours about? Since you're going first today.
Brandon (00:17.462)
Yeah, do you, so I'll say, cause mine's first of all say, today's episode is on bizarre murder weapons. And my murder is, and for a little tease on my murder, my murder is about porcelain rage.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (00:32.93)
Ooh, love that. Okay, I love that. All right, let me, I'll start. Oh my, my.
Brandon (00:37.18)
Okay.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (00:49.134)
Welcome to Homicide the Podcast. I'm Kevin.
Brandon (00:56.298)
And I'm Brandon. And to date, that was, oh, fuck, that's, as soon as I said that, I was like, no, Kevin has to go. Ha ha. You're welcome, go for it.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (00:58.414)
in... oh.
Yeah, we have to do the... Should we do... Okay, this might change some stuff, because now we have Anna on camera. Should we have you introduce yourself too? At the top? Be like, hi, I'm Kevin, I'm Brandon, and I'm Anna. Yeah. Okay, let's do that. Start ting again. Welcome to Homicide the Podcast.
Anna Howard (01:04.71)
Hahaha
Anna Howard (01:11.705)
If you want me to. I'm just like.
And I'm Anna! Sure. Let's do it.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:31.268)
I'm Kevin.
Brandon (01:32.844)
and I'm Brandon.
Anna Howard (01:34.493)
and I'm Anna. Ah!
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:36.046)
Anna! I love this. For everyone listening, Homicide, the podcast is for the girls, gays, and theys who love true crime and hate the culture of sensationalizing murder.
Brandon (01:49.954)
Yes, and today's episode is on bizarre murder weapons. And my episode has the title of porcelain rage. What's yours, Kev?
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (02:00.61)
goodness. Mine can be described in one word, Humpernickel.
Yeah, we'll get to see what that means. That juice is interesting. How are both of you guys?
Anna Howard (02:07.981)
Okay. I'm good, I'm freezing cold in my room right now because my radiator doesn't work. But other than that, I'm doing so well. It's very cold. It's just a little bit chilly. It was like, it was in the 20s this morning, so.
Brandon (02:08.47)
Just pumpernickel.
Brandon (02:20.153)
Oh no.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (02:22.978)
Fantastic.
Brandon (02:23.079)
And it's like fairly cold in New York today, isn't it?
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (02:26.666)
Yeah, it's a little bit chilly. Yeah. I'm like, it's a little chilly. It's pretty fucking cold.
Brandon (02:30.006)
Oh yeah, it's 30. It's 71 here in Tampa, Florida. Ugh.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (02:35.114)
Yeah, I did see that and I was like, I'm not gonna do that. So I've been inside all day. Yeah, but that polar vortex that's happening right now across the United States is coming to New York. So it does snow this week, I think. Yeah, and it's like 16 degrees or something. I'm like, oh.
Anna Howard (02:38.324)
Yeah.
Brandon (02:38.445)
Enjoy it.
Anna Howard (02:47.046)
Oh, I didn't know that. Yay.
Brandon (02:48.95)
Yeah. And yeah, and by the time that you're listening to this, it will be, it had snowed a week ago.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (02:55.61)
Mm. True. We are recording before.
Anna Howard (02:57.833)
I just want the snow to actually stick on the ground because it keeps snowing and then it's like it just rained and the fun of snow is to have it stick on the ground.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (03:04.438)
I know.
I agree, because I kind of want to go play in the park with the snow, right? Like, who am I going to play with myself? But, and not in a weird way. But still, you know. Anyway, we're recording today and Anna and I are both in New York, not too far from each other. And Brandon is still in Tampa. So there's that.
Anna Howard (03:10.613)
Yeah, me too.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (03:29.898)
Um, it's weird to be a Brandon. I've been apart for a hot minute, which is, uh, you know, when you're married and have been together as long as we have it, it's a little bit weird, but.
Brandon (03:35.159)
Not usual.
Yeah, well, I mean, for the last, but we're almost hitting six years of owning our own business. And for those six years, we have been together almost that whole time. So anytime we have a part, it's always just a little bit bizarre. Not as bizarre as these murder weapons, but bizarre.
Anna Howard (03:49.833)
Wait, I feel like you guys, y'all should fill the audience in a little bit, like how did owning a business together come about, how did that happen?
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (03:51.794)
Yeah.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (04:00.366)
Great question. God, well, it actually, no, it's actually kind of a funny story. It jumps back to when Brandon and I, the first night that we met, we met through a mutual friend and that mutual friend was like when I moved to New York. Our mutual friend named Michael I met at Disney because I did the Disney college program back in the day.
Anna Howard (04:03.025)
You're like, I don't know.
Brandon (04:04.011)
Right, that is.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (04:22.366)
and he grew up in Connecticut with Brandon. And so one day when we were in Disney, he was like, there's this guy that I have always had a crush on who's gonna come hang out with us. And I was like, okay, he's like, you should come. And I didn't, cause I was going on a date with a girl. That's a whole other thing. But so I went on a date instead and Brandon ended up hanging out with those guys. Anyway, so jump fast forward when I'm moving out to New York city.
Brandon (04:33.506)
Ooh.
Anna Howard (04:40.34)
Oh my god.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (04:48.578)
And I was already there. My friend Michael was back in Connecticut and he goes, remember that guy that I had a crush on, he just came out and I think that you should talk to him since you've been out since you were 17. And I was like, okay. Yeah, so I reached out to Brandon. I was like, hey, do you wanna meet up? But I remember looking at his Facebook profile and I was like, yo, not my type. But I wasn't even in a space to like date somebody because I was still with, not really with my ex, but I had, okay.
Anna Howard (05:05.709)
Oh my god. That's so rude.
Brandon (05:05.995)
So rude, right? Right? So rude.
Brandon (05:15.354)
Because he was just a bitch. I'm just kidding.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (05:18.638)
Maybe that too. But anyway, so we met and hung out and that night Brandon, I was like, what do you want to do with your future or whatever, which is such an intense question to ask on a not first date. So
Anna Howard (05:30.637)
What do you wanna do with your future?
Brandon (05:31.258)
Right? In little like 20, what, how old was I? 23. 23 year old me was like, oh, I don't know. I think I want to own my own agency.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (05:37.154)
I think so. They don't know. Yeah, so that's what he said. He's like, I think I want to own my own agency one day. And I was like, what? Yeah. So anyway, we kind of went on a path and I was at an agency because I'd switched my career and all this kind of shit. So anyway, I was kind of like, I don't want to work for anybody anymore. Brandon has this dream to own this thing and I think I can do it. So I left my job and I was like a creative director of-
Anna Howard (05:39.081)
I don't know.
Anna Howard (05:42.573)
Wow.
Wait, that's wild. You actually did, though. Ha ha.
Brandon (05:47.89)
Yeah.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (06:06.954)
a photo and started our agency in Tampa, not knowing one person. And I, yeah.
Brandon (06:13.514)
Yeah, we moved up here and started it right away.
Anna Howard (06:16.329)
Why did you move there if you don't know anybody?
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (06:19.466)
Um, Brandon.
Brandon (06:21.462)
Oh, man, you're asking all these questions that are so layered, right? So for a quick synopsis, you're like, I have no idea. I'm sorry. So we were living in. Yeah. So we were we met in New York. We moved to Denver for a little bit. Kevin got recruited back to New York with the job he was working. So we moved back to New York within six months. We both ended up getting laid off from our jobs. And we had. Yeah, we had no money. Kevin's was coming. Yeah. So he.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (06:25.518)
They are very layered.
Anna Howard (06:29.309)
Oops.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (06:29.787)
Oh, no.
Anna Howard (06:46.061)
Classic.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (06:47.84)
Ish. My layoff was coming, but I walked out. But Brandon was definitely laid off.
Brandon (06:51.534)
He ended up walking out before it happened. But we, yeah, we had just moved. It was only six months. We didn't really have any money. So we decided reluctantly to move down to Florida to be closer to my family. Because at that time we kind of had a rocky relationship. And it was really Kevin who was like, yes, let's move down to Florida because we can fix this relationship and kind of figure it out from there. In our apartment at the time, we were able to move down to an apartment in.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (06:54.002)
No.
Anna Howard (06:54.765)
Slay.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (07:09.557)
Mm-hmm.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (07:21.239)
Near Miami or for Lauderdale.
Brandon (07:21.754)
in Florida for free, but they told us when we went to go tell our lease, our apartment at the time, that we wanted to move apartments because they owned properties. And they said, we're selling all of the Florida properties by the end of the year, so you have to do it by the end of the year. And it was like December 1st that we went and told them. So within a couple of weeks, we had to find an apartment and move. And
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (07:43.15)
Yeah.
Brandon (07:49.674)
we could only find an apartment in South Florida. But I went to college in Sarasota, which is on the other coast of Florida. And I just thought, I think if we're gonna go anywhere, I think Tampa just makes sense. It's a lot more urban. It's a little bit different of a city in Florida. So it doesn't have like that gross Florida feel. But the only properties they had were in South Florida. So we moved down to South Florida for two years and it was probably the most depressive time of our lives. We ended up going up to Tampa for my...
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (08:01.954)
Yeah.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (08:13.738)
horrible. It was horrible. It's where we got fat.
Anna Howard (08:15.792)
Oh no.
Brandon (08:18.274)
30th birthday, yeah, we got fat. We went up to Tampa for my 30th birthday and we were like, yep, we're moving here. So I moved maybe a month later, I moved up, we bought a house, I moved up first. And then for nine months, Kevin worked remotely so he would come home on the weekends and go down to South Florida during the week. And there was multiple times where he would come up during the week, come up on Tuesday night and go back.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (08:28.97)
You moved first.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (08:38.49)
But it worked remotely. Yeah.
Brandon (08:45.954)
Wednesday morning, the three, three and a half hour drive just because he wanted to be home. So it was a lot. So when we decided to start the business and for Kevin to quit his job and come up, we were like, fuck it, let's just start it. Kevin will dive right in. He has that kind of personality where he doesn't care if people don't like him or what they think about him, but he's gonna come be himself no matter what he wants to do and, and just be him and it proved to be very good for us because he was able to grow this whole
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (08:47.598)
It was horrible.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (09:03.154)
He's aggressive.
Brandon (09:14.466)
this whole shebang and now we have a staff of, there's seven of us, we're probably gonna be hiring two more people this year and we're a full creative and marketing agency and we do a lot of really fun work for some of our clients.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (09:20.791)
Yeah.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (09:26.006)
Yeah, it's pretty cool what we were able to kind of grow, but I was able to grow it enough to have Brian leave his job within a year, which is crazy. And so he left and then we've been growing since then. We'll be hitting six years in April, which is stupid crazy. But yeah.
Brandon (09:32.698)
Mm-hmm. Yeah.
Anna Howard (09:32.993)
Wow, that's amazing.
Brandon (09:39.286)
Yeah. And now, yeah, and part of our dream was to be able to get back to New York. And so this year we really, or last year, we really worked hard to figure it out. And so by May we got back up to New York with our apartment and now we've been doing this, this cross country. I almost, I want to say by coastal every time, but it's not.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (09:55.338)
by state, you know, whatever thing, which is interesting. I almost did too, but that's not right. It's like, it's actually technically called reverse snowbirds, reverse snowbirds, because snowbirds relocates. Like Brandon's parents are technically snowbirds because they moved from Connecticut to South Florida or to Lakeland, Florida to like get away from the cold. And then we are doing both, which is a reverse snowbird. So we like go down and then come back, go down, come back, whatever.
Anna Howard (10:11.197)
Okay, yeah. Oh, and you moved here. Yeah.
Mm.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (10:20.406)
which is interesting, but we never wanted to leave New York City, like at all. In fact, I went into like a pretty bad depressive state and I had this cool freelance job at this photo place working as like a digital tech for a company that did mostly e-com fashion, so they shot for like Macy's and all these things and I was running, basically running the set. And they kept me on, but I had a huge panic attack in the fucking airport in South Florida to come back here.
and couldn't get on the plane and was definitely fired. I mean, I wasn't fired because I was a contractor, but it was horrible. And so, yeah, that part of our life was rough. And we also worked for this company and this guy that he said to me once that somehow I got labeled as like the issue, which I think is because I was just so direct in general, but Brandon and I worked there together, but he actually pulled me in his office one day and he was like, I think that...
Brandon (10:59.331)
It was rough.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (11:14.686)
your rough childhood is coming out in your adulthood. And I was like, first off, thank you. I was like, you will never talk about that again, ever. I was such a cunt. But like he, oh, he was, it was not great. Yeah, so I ended up leaving before Brandon left. And then we left, or then he left, or whatever. And then I went to that other agency and then well, a little of Tampa, there we are. And now we're in New York and Tampa, which is great.
Anna Howard (11:19.037)
Inappropriate, extremely inappropriate. Yeah, what?
Brandon (11:20.753)
Right? Yep.
Brandon (11:28.25)
I mean, it was fucking rude.
Brandon (11:40.502)
Yep.
Anna Howard (11:41.605)
Okay, amazing. Now the listeners know some of the lore, probably not all of it. I'm sure more of it will come out with time, but.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (11:44.298)
Yes. There's, no, there's a lot more about that. Yeah. Great question though. Anna, you should be like an interviewer. So good. So good. Anyway, yeah, so interesting stuff. Oh God.
Brandon (11:45.418)
I know. Yeah. Oh, I'm sure it will.
Anna Howard (11:53.704)
Oh my gosh, you're so right!
Brandon (11:58.222)
She's like, how did that drama make you feel?
Anna Howard (12:02.475)
Can you imagine if I was like, so Kevin, how did that childhood? I like go on from what you said a second ago. I'm like, so what about that childhood? How did that make you feel? You're like, okay, I'll tell you.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (12:05.322)
Oh my god. Let's talk about your childhood. I'd be like...
Brandon (12:07.301)
Ha ha
Brandon (12:10.882)
Hahaha
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (12:12.45)
God, I'm such an open book too that I'd be like, let's dive in, but no, Jesus Christ. I know even in our improv classes, I'm like, wow, I can't believe I just told that story. Whatever.
Brandon (12:15.466)
Right.
Anna Howard (12:23.465)
I learned so much about you and improv.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (12:25.586)
I think everybody did and they were like, I do not want to know him. They're like, wow. Actually, I know there was that one time when we went to rat scraps that Shannon, like we took classes Shannon O'Neill, who was like a great improv, improviser. Improviser, thank you so much. That was really weird. Anyway, and she, I like rose my hand because they like get shit from the audience or whatever to be able to support their show. And,
Brandon (12:27.939)
Mm.
Brandon (12:31.298)
He's got a lot of stories.
Anna Howard (12:43.23)
Improvisor?
Brandon (12:44.926)
Yeah, it's like it's not that hard of a word.
Anna Howard (12:47.186)
Improviser.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (12:55.546)
I raised my hand and I was like, okay, I have this thing. And I talked about the fact that like my biological grandma, my mom's mom slept with two brothers, not her brothers, but two men that were brothers and had kids like with both brothers. And she like openly was like, yeah, I know him. His life is fucked up. And I'm like, you know, it's interesting. Anyway, all right, with all that said, shall we dive into?
Brandon (13:16.759)
Hehehehe
Anna Howard (13:19.647)
Oh my god.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (13:24.61)
the episode. Oh wait, a couple things to mention. Obviously, Homotown Murders, if you have one, email us, murder at homoscipodcast.com. And then hello, subscribe on YouTube, follow us on Apple.
Anna Howard (13:35.952)
Wait, but what is a hometown murder if somebody has never listened before?
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (13:40.098)
This is why you're our producer. So for those who haven't listened, yes, Homo town murders are basically your hometown murder. We just wanted to make it gay, so it's a Homo town murder. And it's basically you write us and let us know what that murder is all about with all of the details. And then you can join us on the podcast to tell it to our listeners and us, which is exciting. So if you have that, email it to us at murder at homosidepodcast.com. Thank you, Anna. And then also, yes, subscribe.
Brandon (13:42.607)
Yeah.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (14:08.818)
subscribe on YouTube and then follow us on Apple and on Spotify and then please leave us a review, rate us and review us we would love to hear from you. And that's that. So Brandon, I think you go first today.
Brandon (14:20.822)
that's the spiel. I do. Are you ready to hear about the porcelain rage? That I quickly just created the headline, so I think it makes sense, so we'll go with it. Okay, cool. So on May 31st, 2006, a woman named Jessica, and I don't know how to pronounce this, I'll
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (14:24.344)
Yeah.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (14:30.059)
Um, I think we both are.
Anna Howard (14:31.335)
Yeah.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (14:36.412)
Fantastic.
Brandon (14:51.722)
I'm assuming it's like, is that French? I don't know. Got a call from a man named Sean, the boyfriend of her best friend, Christina Eubanks, who is a 20 year old woman who lived in Tennessee. Sean moved to Wilmington, Delaware in 2005, and the two of them started their long distance relationship. And Sean would visit her often, meeting in 2004 while they were both, they both worked at the grocery chain Fresh Market.
The two quickly got attached and friends even noted that they were in love. And now by 2006, Sean was already in Wilmington, Delaware. And I didn't see why he ended up moving, but they continued their relationship into 2006. So calling and texting each other all the time, they were constantly in communication. So on May 29th, it was no surprise to Sean that they would be talking on the phone.
She let him know that she was going to stay home from work that day because her ever aching carpal tunnel Being that she was still a cashier her wrist would uh Hurt quite often and give her a lot of pain. So she was calling out of work that day From there They hung up and went on their day chatting a couple more times throughout the day Neither of them knew that when they hung up and said good night around 10 or 11 that evening that would be the last Time that they would ever speak By the time the 30 31st, I know I know that's always like a hard line
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (16:14.546)
Oh, little nuggets. That's sad. I know.
Brandon (16:19.099)
by the time, because you don't think of that when you're saying goodbye to somebody on the phone that, oh, that's maybe the last time I ever talked to you, right?
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (16:23.466)
Yeah, I feel like that's like the normal. I know, well, and everyone I feel like in any 2020 or dateline, they're like, that was the last time that they would speak and you're like, Oh, that's totally true.
Brandon (16:31.482)
I know that's why I added it. I know. So by the time the 31st came around, Sean had not heard anything from Christina for quite some time. So obviously he was very concerned because they would talk all the time. He reached out to many of her friends and family and he would get the same answer that they haven't heard from her. Now Sean thought that this was weird because Christina was not the type of person to not answer people. She was not secretive and she was pretty open. She was a pretty open book.
Then when he heard that she did not go to work, she did not go to work for her next shift, he got even more concerned. So when Jessica got a call from Sean, she got a little bit worried. She also had not heard from her, so she figured she would head over to her apartment to check it out. With an uncomfortableness that came over her, Jessica decided to make her way to Christina's basement level apartment in the Fort Sanders area of Knoxville, Tennessee around 5 p.m. that evening. When she arrived,
She obviously tried knocking on the door, but nobody answered. One of Christina's neighbors though, Bill, also hadn't heard from Christina either, and he stopped to help. Deciding to open up one of the windows of Christina's apartment, they were both just surprised to hear her dog barking and the noise of her phone ringing in the distance because Jessica was trying to call her.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (17:51.05)
Okay, is this a little bit weird, but like, Bill, her neighbor, didn't hear from her either. Did they talk a lot? Like, do you guys talk to your neighbors a lot?
Brandon (17:57.694)
Well, I think it was just like a small little thing. Like, I think there was only a few units. So I think Christina was just a bubbly, friendly person and he happened. They just knew everybody. It's not like, like we're talking about Tennessee. We're not talking about like New York, where you don't know any of your neighbors and you are right next door. People actually know their neighbors in different areas. I know you do, which is bizarre. Don't get murdered.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (18:02.817)
Oh.
Sure. Okay.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (18:16.599)
Yeah, I talk to our neighbor now, Brandon. She's very nice. I know.
Brandon (18:23.254)
Anyways, opening the window more, Bill stepped inside of the apartment and opened up the front door for Jessica. Entering the home, Jessica was immediately really confused. First, she was confused to see that Christina's dog was locked up in the bedroom. There was no food or water out for the dog and there was feces piled on the floor, which is not common occurrence for her dog because Christina's dog was very well behaved. And Christina was also not one to just leave her pet. If she was going out,
if she wasn't going to be around and she was going out for too long, there was always somebody at the ready to take care of the dog in her absence. So Jessica continued on, alarmed by the state of Christina's room. She was quoted in the trial saying, her bedroom was very, like the stuff was scattered all over. Sheets were thrown to the side of the bed and hanging over the side of the bed. And there was just random items, like all against the wall on the side of the bedroom that
was out of the norm. Jessica was also confused to see random things out of order like the toilet tank lid was missing and the living room furniture was not where they usually were. Like the couch was askew, the coffee table wasn't where it was supposed to be.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (19:35.534)
Wait, I'm sorry, the toilet lid was missing? Huh.
Brandon (19:39.142)
Yeah, just random things. Like it was completely out of the blue. Like it just felt very random She also noticed that all of the belongings that one would have when they leave the home were still there Like her purse was there Her phone was still there obviously and even her glasses were left on the side table Which was very odd because Christina had very poor eyesight and there was varying sizes of white fragments strewn about the apartment so
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (19:44.302)
Weird.
Brandon (20:07.066)
Jessica decided to call the police and filed a missing persons report as I feel like anybody would at that point So soon after the police arrived to the apartment and immediately they started to notice some things were off first They see the same white fragments Jessica pointed out outside of the apartment on the driveway Then they entered the apartment and they started to see something Jessica did they started to see some things that Jessica did not there was
blood droplets on the vinyl flooring and absorbed into the carpet. There was slight blood splatter on the wall and blood on a bottle and a vodka bottle nearby. So on a water bottle and a vodka bottle, there was blood on it. They also saw a pair of sweatpants thrown by the TV. And in the bedroom, they saw a vibrator stained with blood. So yeah, so from here, they immediately thought something bad happened.
And this is where I'm going into a lot of detail, but this story is a hard one. When I first started it, I didn't realize that it was gonna be as crazy as it is, but this...
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (21:15.85)
tell me the vibrator was the murder weapon. Okay. Oh my god, this is just...
Brandon (21:19.11)
No, but it was used in the murder. Yeah, so Yeah, so When the police started their investigation, um, I saw a few sources that say some of her friends were Worried about talking to the police. So again, this was back in 2006 and at a time when marijuana was not legal and A lot of her friends were afraid of getting caught with weed So now christina herself was a pot smoker as well being that she had carpal terminal it helped with her symptoms
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (21:38.709)
Mm.
Brandon (21:48.798)
And most of our friends also smoked. Even to the point where one of our friends wouldn't let the police into their home because they were afraid of getting caught. Which the cops, from what I saw, were like, it's the least of our worries is your weed. Can we figure out this murder? So, however, one by one people's... Right, I know, I know. Yeah, we confiscate your weed and we will smoke it. So, yeah. So...
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (22:01.41)
Like whatever, yeah. Yeah, yeah.
Anna Howard (22:05.017)
They're all like, we smoke weed too, it's fine.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (22:09.723)
I go, 100%. And we're going to smoke it in the car. Thank you.
Brandon (22:15.454)
One by one, people started to talk to the police, and most people talked about the same person. Joe Hill, or also known as Marvin Joseph Hill. And for the rest of this, I just call him Joe, because that's how it was in the case report. So, Joe was a 49-year-old married man who lived in the area that was also the local pizza delivery man and local marijuana drug dealer. Which.
You would think that juxtaposition is probably really good. Like I'll get weed and pizza. Great.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (22:42.614)
Wait, his name was Joe?
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (22:47.664)
Wait, wait, his name is Joey makes pizza?
Brandon (22:53.092)
He doesn't make it, he just delivers it.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (22:55.37)
Oh, but he's a pizza delivery driver that is named Joe. What is this like correlation with Joe's and pizza? I love it so much. The reason I say is because Brandon's brothers has this lovely pizza stone thing in his backyard. And for Christmas, I was in a shop like in the West Village and found a candle that said, Joe, what did it say again? Joe.
Anna Howard (22:56.321)
He's Jo's Pizza.
Brandon (23:00.43)
Yes.
Brandon (23:20.67)
It said, the name of the candle was pizza from a guy named Joe. And it's like a tomato basil scented candle. It was so bizarre, but so perfect for him.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (23:24.674)
Oh yeah, pizza from a guy named Joe and I was like, that is so good. Yeah, it was perfect. I know, I feel kind of bad cause he opened it and he was like, hmm. And I'm like, I don't know how it smells. I just bought it. Capi. Yeah. Ew, ew, yeah. Anyway, sorry. Joe and pizza, all right.
Anna Howard (23:30.397)
Ew, that does not sound like a good candle though.
Brandon (23:37.27)
Well, and basil can sometimes smell like cat pee too. Right? Chris. Yeah, so anyways, so Joe, Christine, and Sean would often hang out together when Sean was in town. So Joe was their dealer, and they would commonly chill and smoke weed in her apartment. And it was also noted that at trial, that the three of them, alongside Joe's wife, Robin, would even travel together, sometimes going to Kentucky to play bingo, which I thought was weird.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (23:57.936)
pizza.
Brandon (24:07.362)
Kentucky to play bingo, but and they would even. Huh? Yeah, but also it's weird to. Like, but it's there in their 20s like going to play bingo to trap like it's just weird. Anyways. Kevin so logical about it. How many times have you crossed eight lines to play bingo?
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (24:08.934)
I think that border is really close though. Like, depending where they live. I don't know. People from...
Anna Howard (24:18.317)
traveling to play bingo.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (24:21.754)
I'm going to Kentucky tonight to play bingo. Yeah, I mean, I don't know.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (24:29.546)
Let me think.
Brandon (24:30.122)
When was the last time you played bingo?
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (24:32.438)
Hmm, let me think. I don't know. Rude. God.
Brandon (24:34.582)
Exactly. Okay. Anyways, they even noted that they would, they would go to Joe and Robin's house and spend time there as well. So from what I've seen about Joe is that he's had kind of a colorful past, but there wasn't too much I could find out about his childhood. But we do know that Joe has been in some trouble with the law before for burglary. Just a
Brandon (25:02.53)
Just a short time prior, he was released from a 13-year sentence for burglary in Ohio. So he was kind of, he understood the law and how things worked. So, um, so jumping forward back to 2006, um, I have a new person who enters the story and there's a couple of people who enter, but they're not really main characters here. They're just additive. So,
Here enters this man named Dustin. So Dustin knew both Christina and Joe, being that he was Christina's next door neighbor. He was also, he was friendly with her. And he often smoked weed with Joe as Joe was his dealer. I think Joe was just a very popular man in the area, just because he was a dealer. So in the, huh?
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (25:42.63)
He's a dealer. I said, because he's a dealer. Yeah.
Brandon (25:47.062)
Yeah. So in the morning hours of May 30th, Dustin was walking back to his house after a long night of drinking and smoking weed the whole night. And he was a little surprised to see Joe coming out of Christina's apartment. They spoke briefly and Joel told him that he was helping Christina's boyfriend move out. And and Dustin didn't really think anything of it. But again, he was also he was impaired. He was drinking and smoking all night. So his
His brain wasn't in the right mind to really understand what was happening. So while they were talking, they decided to go to a convenience store nearby, and they walked together. However, Joe headed back before Dustin did. When Dustin got back, he was a little puzzled to see Joe laying down in the backseat of his car, right outside of the apartment. He then told police that Joe saw him and he sat up. He's quoted to tell him the authorities that,
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (26:21.066)
Mm-hmm.
Brandon (26:44.886)
Joe was acting somewhat shaky and a little upset, but he noted that his behavior was not anything that really alarmed him or anything else that made him know anything was going on. So Joe then reiterates to Dustin that Christina's boyfriend asked him to get there, to get some of his things for him. So now when Dustin hears this, when Dustin hears that Christina went missing, he quickly called the police and told him everything he knew, because he thought it was weird.
So part of this is, I was writing the notes from the case files of it. So this kind of follows the trial in general. So later in the trial, we'd also hear from another acquaintance of Joe's, Timothy Marshall, that on June 1st, he got a call from Joe asking to deliver a message to Dustin for him. And Timothy was quoted in saying that, he told me to tell Dustin that Dustin didn't know him.
Dustin didn't see him. He said it was a matter of life or death. He couldn't tell me right now. He'd tell me at a later time that it wasn't it. I delivered the message. That was very interesting to read. I'm reading a quote, so it's interesting because it's just the way of somebody talking. So he basically told, he told Timothy to tell Dustin that
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (28:02.57)
What? Yep. What?
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (28:09.975)
Yeah, yeah.
Brandon (28:14.114)
He doesn't know who Joe is. They never met. He didn't see him that night. That it's a matter of life or death and that he couldn't tell him why, but he'll tell him later. To basically tell Dustin to not tell the police anything, that he knows anything.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (28:28.458)
And this was when, because of the backseat, when he was laying in the backseat of the car after that. Right, okay. Huh.
Brandon (28:32.714)
Yep. Yeah. Yep. So from here, the police started to get suspicious. So they got a warrant to go check out Joe's car. When they got there, Joe's wife Robin was there and she compiled. She complied. I have compiled. It's supposed to say complied. In there she come complied and they towed the car to the crime lab processing bay. Once they started to do testing, all of their suspicions came to light.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (28:51.436)
Wuh
Brandon (29:02.018)
They found blood stains on the back seat and spot remover in the car. On June 3rd, they arrested Joe Hill. However, getting a confession out of him would be hard since he was arrested before he knew how it worked. And he kept his mouth shut saying that he needed a lawyer. They did, however, note, notice that he had some scratches on his face and a bite mark on his hand.
The main goal that the police wanted to know was to find out where the body was because everybody knew that it was Joe it was very evident that Joe was the one who Had something to do with the disappearance of Christina due to the fact that there was blood that came back as being positive of Christina's so they went to Joe's wife to try to coax it out of him, so
Um, uh, luckily for them, one thing that Joe didn't really understand was that when you make a call from jail, it's recorded. Um, and so they went through all of the recordings and in the recordings. Yeah. Right. So he knew all of this stuff, but he didn't realize that the phones are recorded. So, so they have Christina called Joe and tried to coax it out of him. And in the recordings, they heard Joe talk about how he struck Christina.
Anna Howard (30:01.053)
Bruh, are you serious? What an idiot.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (30:06.114)
What an idiot. Oh my god.
Brandon (30:18.526)
in the first blow hit differently. And like, he's talking about the feeling and how it just felt different the first time he hit her. He also bragged to his wife that he had consensual sex and that he had consensual sex that evening. And to make her feel better, he was quoted to say that it wasn't even that fun. Eventually, Joe would come out and claim that the two of them were having an affair for a while. But the majority of people didn't believe him, especially because he was
really not attractive. He in the art, you'll see he was very unattractive and he was 20 years older than her. So people were like, yeah, we don't believe it. So after a bit...
Anna Howard (30:59.721)
Wait, I'm sorry, it is insane to say, yeah, we had consensual sex, but it really wasn't that fun as a way to justify cheating on your partner. Like you're talking to your partner and you're just like, yeah, I did have sex, but like, it wasn't that fun. Okay. Okay, I don't care.
Brandon (31:08.951)
Right?
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (31:09.45)
Yeah.
Brandon (31:13.214)
It wasn't fun. I didn't have a good time. Okay. But she's also missing. So you did more than that. So after a bit of time, they got rough estimates of where the body was from what he was saying, which was in a remote area below a one lane bridge that no one would be able to see from the road. When the police got to the spot mentioned, they were not surprised to see her body below.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (31:13.47)
I wasn't that fun.
What the fuck?
Brandon (31:42.466)
They saw the yellow sheet that was wrapped around her waving in the wind along with some of the bloodstained items from the apartment, like a pillowcase, tablecloths, garbage, and more white fragments. So the police moved below, and I should probably just say trigger warning for the rest of this, just if you have a hard time listening to crime stuff, you probably don't wanna listen, but they saw her body lying in the water below. But by this time, it was a few days later.
So the body already started to decompose. Her skin was purple and starting to marbleize. And in spots, part of her skin was starting to hang off. And there was so much swelling, you could barely recognize her features. So what happened? So according to Joe, Christina called him on the night of May 29th, wanting some weed, agreeing he said he would head on over and he arrived around 11 p.m. that night.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (32:16.279)
Mm.
Brandon (32:40.546)
After a bit of time talking, watching TV, and hanging out with each other, Joe said that he was playing with her dog when the dog bit his hand, running to the bathroom to grab something to help clean up, Christian to put the dog in the bedroom and locked the dog in the bedroom so nothing else would happen. Then he said she came on to him, whispering in his ear saying, I know what you want. He then went into gross detail of their sexual acts and what they did together.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (33:04.471)
Okay.
Brandon (33:08.418)
that he said they did consensually. Once, then once finished, he said that Christina let him know that there was something wrong with her toilet and he asked him to help fix it, which to me was a very quick change of topic from sex to toilet. But allegedly this is what happened according to him. So as soon as he was in there, he made note that he had to end their affair, that.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (33:24.33)
Yeah.
Brandon (33:34.498)
He let her know that his wife was suspicious of them and they needed to stop. And he's communicating this through the walls of the bathroom. So then Joe said, he came out of the bathroom with the lid of the toilet tank still in his hand because he was working in the toilet, so he already had it. And he wasn't thinking, so he came out with it. He said, she started to humiliate him and she started to get a little bit irate. He was...
He was stated saying that he was that she was basically belittling him to make him feel like he was nothing so that he wouldn't leave her in this angered him a lot. So he said he got so angry he lost control and he punched her a few times when being in the face. I think the first one they said was in the chest. But then this didn't stop her and she got a little bit more irate and aggressive. So without thought, he grabbed the toilet lid with both hands and struck her with it. Once once.
She hit the floor. He noticed she was still breathing so she he kept hitting her Every time pieces of the tank would break off and fly around the apartment Eventually after a few blows he hears her Still making gurgling noises. So with the lid in his hands. He kept striking her until she stopped Then with a little bit of remorse He wanted to try to revive her and for some Yeah, right
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (34:49.866)
Oh, I think, okay. Oh, oh, after smashing her face in, okay. Cool, cool, cool.
Brandon (34:56.778)
So, for some reason, he had a stun gun with him. So to revive her, he tried to shock her back with the stun gun. This is the legend of what he did. Frantic leech.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (35:11.634)
I'm sorry that is really funny. It shouldn't be. But what a fucking idiot. What a fucking idiot. Well I smashed your face in bit let me use this stun gun as like a...
Brandon (35:14.614)
It's the most ridiculous thing ever. Right? You just, you just, yeah, you just beat her with this toilet lid and that's not gonna help. Yeah.
Anna Howard (35:23.221)
That also, that's like demented. Yeah, and I don't think he wanted it to help because when you watch someone suffering so much because you just bashed their head in and they're literally gurgling, as soon as there's silence, now you wanna bring them back? What, because you want them to suffer more? Like that's not.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (35:27.423)
It is demented, yeah.
Brandon (35:36.877)
Yeah.
Brandon (35:42.474)
Right, exactly.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (35:43.91)
Or he's like, oh fuck, I just killed somebody. I mean, it just, the stupidity, which this is why it's funny, the stupidity of thinking that you could revive somebody with a stun gun. What a fucking idiot. His stupidity is hilarious. Like it's just, wow. Wow. Okay.
Brandon (35:55.434)
Yeah, I agree. So, well, we're not done. So, frantically trying to figure out what to do, he tried to devise a plan. So his hand was severely injured and he couldn't pick up her body because he, I think it said he broke his hand, but I think with the dog bite, it was, he was injured so he couldn't physically pick her up himself. So he looked around and he decided to grab the nearby,
leash of the dog. He wrapped it around her with the blanket and dragged her to his car. And he says not to strangle her, but just to drag her. Again, doesn't make sense. He then disposed of the lid of the garbage of the lid of the toilet in a garbage that was 10 blocks away and then he said he went to the bridge and dropped her off of the bridge, hoping to hide to the body.
Now, expert testimony said that he's not telling the truth. Surprise, surprise. So according to the medical examiner, Christina was first struck on the back of the head with the toilet lid and he continued to hit her. He hit her so hard it broke her skull and damaged her brain. Then she was strangled. However, Joe did not know was that at this point Christina wasn't actually dead.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (37:00.582)
Bye.
Brandon (37:24.734)
after he beat her and strangled her and dragged her to the car and dispose of her body, she was still alive. And examination showed that she dried from choking on the water in the creek in her own vomit, meaning she was alive the entire time that everything was happening. So the prosecution believes that Joe came on to Christina.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (37:49.101)
No...
Brandon (37:52.97)
and she declined, so he stunned her with a stun gun to sedate her. And then when she woke again and declined to him, it enraged him and he attacked. They believe that he went to the house that day with a purpose, a purpose to sexually assault Christina. Joe's defense tried to claim that the confession over the phone while he was in jail was illegal because he said he wouldn't talk without an attorney. So they said them coaxing his wife for information was obtained illegally.
However, in trial, it was deemed that with how the body was disposed, someone would have seen her, and at some point it would have all come out anyways. And so when the jury went to deliberation, not many people believed his story about there being an affair. And just after three hours of deliberation, the jury came back with a guilty verdict of first degree murder of manslaughter and abuse of a court.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (38:21.401)
Okay.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (38:48.427)
Jesus. Wow. What year was this again?
Brandon (38:50.622)
Yeah, so I went into this one not thinking it was going to be too, too crazy. And then I kept going and I'm like, Oh my God, there's more. There's more and more. So.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (39:02.578)
What year was this one? Geez.
Brandon (39:03.898)
2006. So fuck you Marvin Joseph Hill.
Anna Howard (39:09.505)
Those are the most disturbing ones to me that are like, it's torture what they're doing to people. It's not just murder because I mean, if you shoot someone right in the head, at least it's quick, but that is not quick.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (39:10.946)
Hmm
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (39:15.371)
Mm-hmm.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (39:22.955)
Mm-hmm.
No, it's horrible. It's horrible. Well, and like to stun her all that kind of shit while she was like still alive is horrible. But I bet you the dog bit him because he was murdering her. I wonder if that's more of yeah. Yep, that's what I'm thinking too. What a fucking dickhole. Wow, that is so he so basically he will okay so I'm still stuck on the weird vibrator.
Brandon (39:27.149)
No.
Brandon (39:37.458)
Oh, I would assume so she was probably it was probably during the attack.
Brandon (39:54.922)
Well, it was part of the sexual acts. He was, he did things with her body. Yeah, and so there was, yeah. Yeah, it was just a part of the sexual assault.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (39:57.578)
Oh, because he raped her. Oh my God, I can't. Ooh, okay, yeah, ew. He's a fucking jerk. Wow, Brandon, that is a bizarre murder weapon, but also just, oh, my laundry's done. Which will go off for a hot minute. So talk amongst yourselves since we're recording. I'll be right back.
Brandon (40:10.518)
A really fucked up story.
Anna Howard (40:20.805)
When you said that he was a pizza guy, my first very different pizza guy in my head was my old manager at this Italian restaurant that I worked with, who he was technically the owner's son. So he could have like climbed the ranks, but he was kind of, he was kind of a dummy.
Brandon (40:30.382)
Yeah
Anna Howard (40:43.797)
So he didn't want to. And his entire, he was so happy just making pizzas. Like he loved making pizzas more than anything in the world. Like if he, the rest of his life, he probably wants to make pizzas. He did not want to be a manager at all. He hated managing. He was like, I just want to make pizzas. Very different pizza guy in my head, but I was picturing him. So now my brain, unfortunately, thinking of him doing that to someone.
Brandon (41:05.142)
Yeah, different.
Brandon (41:13.914)
It's awful.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (41:14.986)
I missed half of that, but that just was sad.
Anna Howard (41:17.725)
You know when you have like an image, like if there's a specific detail in a story, your brain immediately pictures whoever it is that you know that has that detail, you know? So if anybody knows any pizza guys, hopefully they're not killing anybody with toilet seats.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (41:23.072)
Mm-hmm.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (41:27.938)
Totally, yeah.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (41:34.766)
You know, make them leave the pizza at your front door. Don't let them in. I don't know.
Anna Howard (41:39.381)
Yeah. Wait, that reminds me of, there was a crazy story about a guy who, I think he was an Uber Eats driver or something in Florida and he ended up killing whoever it was that he like was delivering to. And no prior, yeah, no prior relationship with this person. It was just like, they ordered something on Uber Eats. Yeah.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (41:57.134)
I feel like I've heard something about that too, yeah.
Brandon (41:58.564)
I feel yo.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (42:03.234)
That's like that Uber killer. Yeah, no, thank you. That seat, mm-mm. I barely trust the food when it gets here in general. And if it's like slightly open.
Anna Howard (42:12.12)
That's why I always say just leave it at the door. Like I don't want, I don't, I don't know.
Brandon (42:16.462)
Yeah.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (42:17.366)
I know, I got something last night and they took a picture of my hand, it was really creepy. Like I- Brandon's like- Brandon actually ordered it for me. Um, because I've done like so well in 8 Home the entire week, so I was like, I want a crepe. And so, um, Brandon ordered it for me, because I don't order- I- This is so bizarre, but in relationships, I don't know, one person does something and the other one doesn't- Uh, whatever. Yes, so Brandon's the orderer.
Anna Howard (42:21.525)
Ew.
Brandon (42:21.567)
It was.
Anna Howard (42:37.562)
Yeah, there's roles. I'll do that and you'll do this.
Brandon (42:39.166)
Yeah, Kevin, yeah, he won't order any delivery even if we are not together, we're states away, I'm still ordering his food for him. You've done it before, but it's typical that you're just like, could you just get me this please?
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (42:49.546)
I wouldn't say won't, I just have a four.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (42:56.086)
So I have this weird thing and maybe it's related to my ADHD, I don't know, but I get very overwhelmed by menus, like a lot. And if it's a menu that's like, I'm like, oh my God, do you have a chicken sandwich? And it's like, I just get overwhelmed. So anyway, sometimes with the ordering, there's too many choices and it makes me like, so Brandon helps. So he orders me grapes. Okay.
Brandon (43:14.414)
You can't handle it.
Brandon (43:19.038)
I know where I fit in my art relationship. I understand it, I get it.
Anna Howard (43:21.349)
Yeah, there it rolls. I get it, usually it happens the same way. My boyfriend is the one who orders things, but I think that's just because I don't wanna go through the trouble of signing into Grubhub. I don't know what my Grubhub login is and I don't wanna do the whole forgot password bullshit. So.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (43:33.23)
Sure. Yeah, same.
Yep. Because by the time you're like, okay, do I just make a sandwich or have a hard boiled egg? I don't know. Like it's annoying. So, but I got these crepes last night and the Brandon's like, it's there. And so I'm like, okay, great. So I went to the door and there was a guy there and I literally opened the door looking down and I was like, oh, and he was like, oh, hey, here. And then I took it from him and started closing the door and he's like, oh, I still need to take a picture. And I was like, oh, and so I like stuck it out and hid my face and he's like, I'm not gonna get your face. And I was like, thanks. So Brandon got a picture of it.
Anna Howard (43:42.993)
Yeah.
Anna Howard (44:03.263)
I'm sorry.
Brandon (44:04.554)
Right. And so I get the picture of Kevin's hand in the doorway. I was like, well, I see you got your food.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (44:10.09)
Which is gonna be, anyway. Yeah, I'm like, thanks. Jesus, so weird. Yeah, that too. Well, you know, I would, I, you know, I would put up such a fight that I think that somebody who would try to murder me would be like, this is not worth it. I don't know. Like I would be loud and aggressive and, and I have a weird strong grip in general, right Bran? Where like,
Anna Howard (44:13.273)
Yeah, good that you had evidence of it.
Brandon (44:16.634)
And I'm glad you didn't get murdered.
Anna Howard (44:18.705)
Yeah, that is nice.
Brandon (44:30.891)
I can't deal with this one.
Brandon (44:37.111)
You do.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (44:38.994)
You can't really move. It's really weird. I don't know. Like, Brandon and I will like fuck around and Oh, yeah. And I'm like, I know. Done.
Anna Howard (44:40.962)
Thanks for watching!
Brandon (44:42.574)
It's nice when you have like a kink in your neck and you're like, could you just Yeah, right. It is. It is really funny because if Kevin's ever like, Hey, could you rub my shoulder? Do this? He'll like, show me where it is on his body. And then come to me and, and like press and do it for me to show, to kind of just show me where to do it. But I'm always like, Oh, why are you going so fucking hard? I'm fragile.
Anna Howard (44:47.499)
Could you just crack my back in half for me? Thank you.
Anna Howard (45:06.382)
And you're like, keep doing that.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (45:08.47)
Yeah, Brandon cannot. I'm like, it's not that hard. Anyway.
Brandon (45:12.524)
Oh, but you are.
Anna Howard (45:12.861)
See, I can't get massages in the city because they always go too hard. And even, I just, and then I feel really uncomfortable because I'm like, I don't wanna tell them to like do their job differently, you know? So I'm just, I'm like, ugh, just taking it.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (45:19.186)
I maybe need that.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (45:27.35)
She's like, mm mm. That's really funny. I love massages that in fact, I usually they can't go hard enough. And the last one that we got in Vermont was okay. But the one before that I had this dude and I'm like.
Do you, he, first off, he wouldn't go past like my knee. Like he was very uncomfortable to go up my thigh. And I'm like, this is like, isn't this your job? This is, yeah, he was, he did not do my hips. He did not do like butt cheek, nothing. And, and it was so light that I was like, that was dumb. But yeah, so I, maybe I should try in New York.
Brandon (45:53.11)
He was really scared to touch her booty.
Anna Howard (46:07.057)
I mean, I don't know if you're gonna think this, I'm sure you're gonna love it, because I feel like I've just been beaten up after I leave. I'm like, that was not relaxing.
Brandon (46:12.78)
Oh, he would.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (46:14.334)
I would.
Brandon (46:17.042)
Yeah, I feel like I could. I feel like I could take a bat and literally hit Kevin in the back and he'd be like, did you do something? He likes it so it's so hard where my hands are like on fire trying to rub his shoulder. I'm like, I'm trying my best. I can't help it.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (46:17.212)
Oh my god.
Which is not good. It's not fun.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (46:28.098)
So I think that might be a little different.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (46:36.526)
I know. I get all of my stress is like held within my like, upper back and neck and shoulders. And so you have to go like really pretty hard, because I can't really feel it a ton, which maybe is an issue. I don't know. Maybe. Oh my god. All right. Well.
Anna Howard (46:43.67)
Yeah.
Brandon (46:50.374)
We should probably get that checked, just in case. If there's a doctor listening to the podcast, if you have any ideas.
Anna Howard (46:57.543)
Let us know.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (46:57.706)
Is there a condition that can also match my skin condition that I just got diagnosed with? Cause that would be great. Anyway, my Lord. Okay, getting older is fun. So great. All right, should we go into my story? It's much quicker and maybe more funny. I know yours was like, I actually felt sad at the end of yours. So Christina.
Brandon (47:08.586)
Right, you just slowly start to fall apart.
Brandon (47:15.79)
Let's do it. We need to know about the pumpernickel.
Brandon (47:23.406)
Right?
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (47:27.486)
Um, okay. Well, you guys, I titled mine again, and it's very simple. It's just titled, Oreginald. So, it was January 25th. Yeah. What do you take away from this already? What can you maybe... Okay, love that, love that.
Brandon (47:39.111)
Okay, so the two takeaways we have so far is Reginald and Pumpernickel.
Anna Howard (47:47.601)
sounding like a cartoon to me right now.
Brandon (47:50.606)
It sounds like a like a old story of a white man in his bread.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (48:00.486)
Okay. I think there's a version of that.
Brandon (48:01.694)
Am I close? I mean, who eats pumpernickel? Whenever I think of pumpernickel, I think of like old, like just old people, like older than my grandparents old.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (48:09.534)
Well, so there are some Colton locations, cultures that do eat it, and Britain is one of them. So my story is a British. So, Reginald. Okay.
Brandon (48:21.966)
Well, that makes sense.
Brandon (48:27.978)
And are we going to get your British accent the whole time?
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (48:31.526)
No, no. I thought about it earlier and then I tried it and I was like, well, that sounded dumb. So I didn't do it. Because there are some quotes in here. No, I will not. Thank you. Okay. Someday. I mean, I do it sometimes when we're like, doing stuff or whatever. I don't know, I switch between like an Australian and a Brooklyn and a British and a country and it's just not great. So, yes.
Brandon (48:38.459)
Could you give us just like a little preview of what you were doing?
We'll get him to do it sometime.
Brandon (48:54.179)
Southern.
Anna Howard (48:56.605)
multifaceted.
Brandon (48:57.258)
I think it's entertaining.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (49:00.374)
So it was January 25th of 1988, when an article appeared in the Sarasota Herald Tribune opinion section with the headline, Hard Bread Can Double As Weapon.
So this is the story of the unsolved murder of Sir Reginald Hemsley Dottingdale, which by the way is the most British name ever. Sir Reginald Hemsley Dottingdale.
Brandon (49:25.082)
That is... I'm sorry, but it's unsolved, but we know that he was murdered with bread?
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (49:31.338)
Yes, which is interesting. And there's like no information on this, like at all. So I don't really have much. So we're just gonna take a little journey down some history about pumpernickel bread and some other shit. So anyway, this, I know, I found this to be really interesting. So I wanna jump into pumpernickel bread first because it actually is interesting, but.
Brandon (49:46.366)
Exactly what we all want to hear. I'm excited.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (49:55.914)
I hate pumpernickel bread by the way, but pumpernickel bread if you haven't had it is super dense, very dark, and very hearty. So if you need to shit, very good. But it also tastes like rye bread, which if you know me, you know that I fucking hate rye bread. Like a lot.
Brandon (50:08.862)
you cannot stand. Like, Kevin even hates the rice seeds that are in everything bagels. Like, if there's a bagel with a rice seed in it, he will not have it. And I'm like, it's the best bagel.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (50:15.463)
Uh...
Anna Howard (50:20.041)
Wait, I actually, I'm the opposite. I love, I love a seated bread. I love a seated bread.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (50:25.635)
Oh god. I cannot stand it.
Brandon (50:25.978)
I do too. Kevin is always the white bread kind of person. Even if we try to get like wheat, he might do like the honey wheat, but you won't do any kind of wheat with any seed in it.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (50:36.014)
I like white, I like wonder, orphanage style wonder bread. I grew up in an orphanage and so they did not.
Brandon (50:43.321)
Do not say Orbitage style, not government bread.
Anna Howard (50:43.633)
You should, well, the orphanage, I want to read. You should put on your actor hat and act like a pilgrim for a day and see how it influences your bread taste.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (51:00.15)
My, hmm, that's really interesting.
Anna Howard (51:04.659)
Just think like a pilgrim.
Brandon (51:05.038)
He's like, no.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (51:07.936)
Maybe I'll go out to the ruins in Salem and Dressen. What?
Brandon (51:09.534)
Minus all like the...genocide.
Anna Howard (51:13.001)
What? You just said the word gen. Oh. Honestly, I just, my, I literally just saw you go, genocide, and that was it, and I was like, I was like, wait, what are we talking about?
Brandon (51:15.21)
You said act like a program. I said minus the genocide.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (51:18.702)
Oh, yeah. I was like, what are you talking about?
Brandon (51:21.41)
You know, in the-
Brandon (51:26.784)
Hahaha
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (51:30.918)
It's the same thing that I saw, that's why I was like... Where did we go?
Brandon (51:32.458)
I know, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, because as I was.
Anna Howard (51:34.345)
You're so right though, pilgrims and genocide are deeply connected.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (51:37.758)
and genocide. And seeded bread, apparently.
Brandon (51:38.938)
They are. Right? I know. And as I was saying it and I got closer because I was like, oh wait, is Kevin speaking? I can't tell because I was talking at the same time you are. And so we totally did that. And I feel like now that we're-
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (51:49.603)
You know what I do like though? Feel like what? What Brandon? We're still on genocide, keep going.
Brandon (51:54.266)
I have to say now that we're doing this virtually for right now, it's gonna happen a lot where we're gonna talk over each other.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (51:59.558)
I know. Like, we do that anyway. But... Oh, I just got a beard here in my mouth. There she is. Okay. The joys of having a beard. Um, I don't remember where we were. Shit. Now I have genocide in my head. Pilgrims. Oh! The type of bread I do like is sprouted bread. Which does have also some seeds in it, but it tastes very different. I don't know. Okay, wait. Do I love it? I love it with a lot of butter and honey on it.
Brandon (52:02.027)
We do.
Brandon (52:06.03)
Gross.
Brandon (52:13.818)
pilgrims pumpernickel
Anna Howard (52:25.79)
I don't know the difference.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (52:30.382)
delicious, but that's it. Okay, pumpernickel bread. Back to it. Oh, the other thing that I really don't like is Brandon loves everything bagels, but once he's done eating them, he has so many black little seeds in his teeth that I'm always like, you know, can you handle that?
Brandon (52:36.953)
The more you know.
Anna Howard (52:37.173)
Ha ha ha.
Brandon (52:45.283)
Yeah. Yeah, but then he doesn't tell me and then it'll be like an hour later I'll go in the mirror and be like, why didn't you tell me my teeth are disgusting right now? Right?
Anna Howard (52:45.517)
Yeah, that's rough.
Anna Howard (52:53.11)
Road.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (52:54.706)
I don't- I'm not investigating your teeth, you weirdo. Like, I'm not like, wow.
Brandon (52:57.822)
No, but you were supposed to like, you know, look at me when we're engaging with each other and one would notice.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (53:02.57)
I do, I look at your eyes and your tip of your nose, and then I don't look at, I'm not, oh my God, anyway. Every time that I'm like, oh yeah, I did see, oh no, yeah, I did see just a little speck. I'm just not like, oh, pause our conversation. Can you pick that out of your mouth? I don't know, whatever. Anyway, all right. Pumpernickel bread. You're welcome, you always do, gross. Figure your life out. Get some tooth ticks. Wait, tooth ticks?
Anna Howard (53:17.453)
Thanks.
Brandon (53:22.33)
It's fine, I'll just have shit in my teeth.
Thank you. Do I, I don't.
Tooth ticks? I don't want any ticks in my teeth.
Anna Howard (53:34.686)
keep those away.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (53:34.815)
Tooth, Hicks, God, we're messy. Anyway, okay. So guys, pumpernickel bread originated in, where do you think it originated in?
Brandon (53:44.066)
pumpernickel? is that like a name of a place?
Anna Howard (53:46.285)
Uh...
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (53:46.616)
No.
Anna Howard (53:48.854)
the UK.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (53:50.854)
it originated in Hermony, AKA Germany, which I did not know. Yeah. So I found this actually kind of really funny. Pumpernickel actually does mean something and comes from some different words in Germany. So it's actually a German word that comes from pumpern, which actually means to break wind, AKA fart. And nickel.
Anna Howard (53:54.393)
Oh, that was my second guess.
Brandon (53:55.49)
Harmony.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (54:18.218)
Apparently, the take on the name Nicholas, which is associated with goblins and devilish character. So the word pumpernickel comes from the bread's, this is kind of funny, the overall word comes from the bread's reputed indigestibility, because it's so fibrous that it really, you get some poops. So basically, the word, so think about it, farts, devil, goblin. So basically the word means that you're eating the devil's farts.
Brandon (54:39.503)
Good to know.
Anna Howard (54:48.605)
Yummy. Delicious. Mmm.
Brandon (54:49.966)
Delicious throw some honey on that
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (54:50.026)
Yeah, so, yeah. Some devil fart honey, yeah, interesting. So I did find this to be very interesting because I like making bread. But bread is actually created, so like the flour that's used in pumpernickel bread is actually created from whole rye berries that are coarse to the ground. There was more than that, but it got really technical and I was like, I don't care. So I stopped there. But the German way to make it,
is actually by combining sourdough starter, yeast, and that flour, which if anybody does any sourdough type of starters and sourdough bread, I love sourdough bread. It's really yummy and in fact we had a starter and in fact sometimes people have starters that are very old, but Brandon killed it. It was his anyway because I didn't make the sourdough bread. Wait, did you kill it or did you just, I don't remember what happened. We don't have it anymore though.
Brandon (55:46.122)
No, I just forgot to I just I left in the fridge and I didn't feed it and then I could have revived it but it just anything that's fermented if it just freaks me out sometimes I was like, I'm just gonna get rid of it and start a new one and then I never started a new one. I will eventually. Well, then we started living in two different places and I'm like, when am I gonna feed it because you have to feed them often. It's like a it's like a it's like a Tamagotchi you got to play with it engage with it before it'll die.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (55:48.45)
feed up. Yeah.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (56:01.398)
So there's that, yeah. So.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (56:07.534)
That's true, I know, now we just need to...
Anna Howard (56:11.501)
I know, I didn't realize it was like an animal.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (56:14.846)
It is, yeah, you're feeding bacteria. It's really weird. Which, yeast, right? Everything, your bread goes from yeast anyway. But, so pumpernickel bread is really an interesting bread. You actually cook it in loaf tins at a temperature that's super low and you cook it for 24 hours, which is why it's actually super brown. Other cultures like add dyes and all that kind of stuff, but the German way, apparently, yeah, that's how long it has to cook for, which I'm like, no, thank you. So.
Brandon (56:15.738)
It is.
Anna Howard (56:21.215)
Yeah.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (56:44.77)
pumpernickel bread, the devil's farts. So with that, let's talk about this murder. Again, not a lot of information, but sometime in 1987 or 1998, I'm not really sure, Sir Reginald Hemsley Dottingdale was found deceased with a large lump on the back of his head. So the Scotland Yard began investigating the death with one investigator being quoted as saying,
pumpernickeling I've ever seen. The poor chap never knew what hit him.
Brandon (57:19.01)
Humpernickeling, it's like a coins term.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (57:19.534)
Would you guys like to? Yeah.
Anna Howard (57:20.205)
Okay, imagine you get murdered and then it's all just like making jokes about the way you were murdered.
Brandon (57:27.304)
I know that sucks.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (57:29.749)
Which is horrible and I tried to do this with like a British accent and I was just laughing through it so I couldn't do it. But I thought that I was like Scotland Yard, which I've heard before but I'm like, well that's interesting let's expand. So the Scotland Yard is the headquarters of the London Metropolitan Police and is responsible for policing London's 32 boroughs. Which by the way I didn't know London had the 32 boroughs.
Brandon (57:52.154)
Yeah, that's a lot.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (57:53.474)
So the Scotland Yard is located now on the River Thames at Victoria Embankment, just north of the Westminster Bridge in the city of Westminster. So the London police force was actually created all the way back in 1829 by an act that was introduced in parliament and replaced the old system of watchmen, which that word creeps me out. I'm not sure why.
So the Scotland Yard is, its headquarters has actually relocated three times in history, landing where they are actually now. So it's called Scotland Yard because the former entrance of the Whitehall Place headquarters, which faced the St. James District of Westminster. So originally Whitehall Place had an exit that was called the Great Scotland Yard, which was named that because it originally housed the Scottish royal family when they visited England's capital.
So after expansion, it was used as the main entrance to the PlayStation and later shortened to Scotland Yard. So from there, the Metropolitan Police became synonymous with that name. So now they're just like known as Scotland Yard, which I found to be very interesting. So they've moved those three times and now they're at that place that I had said, which is not at that exit anymore, but now they're just known as the Scotland Yard. So near Sir Reginald Hemsley, Doddingdale's body was a loaf.
of pumpernickel bread with the approximate hardness of an anvil. Do you guys know what an anvil is? Because I sure didn't.
Brandon (59:21.626)
Oh my gosh.
Anna Howard (59:23.846)
That's an an- I mean I don't actually know what it is but an anvil to me is something you hit somebody over the side of the head with. HAHAHA
Brandon (59:32.687)
I think of cartoons like them dropping on people like on cartoons They're like the big like hard heavy metal like weights, right?
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (59:32.94)
Yep.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (59:36.158)
Okay, yes. It was like the Road Runner. Yes, yes. So an anvil is a heavy steel or iron block with a flat top, concave sides, and is typically pointed at one end. So like, yeah, the Road Runner, those episodes they would drop from the cliff and it would hit that. So.
Anna Howard (59:36.905)
Yeah.
Brandon (59:50.882)
Yeah.
Brandon (59:54.55)
Yeah. Yep. I was thinking of like the Animaniacs. Like I feel like there was a lot of Anvil dropping that. Why was there so many Anvil droppings in our childhood? Like that's very bizarre, right? It's like, it's like quicksand. There's a lot of stories of quicksands like that makes you think that I might encounter quicksand at some point in my life. No, you don't. No. You're never going to. At least yet.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:00:00.55)
Oh yeah, oh my God. Yes. I don't know, it's really fucked up. So I know, and I'm like.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:00:17.922)
I mean, or you do and you just, no one knows because you're dead in the quits and I don't know. So this anvil is actually a metalworking tool because I'm like, I still don't, like I don't know what it's used for. So it's a metalworking tool that's used to forge and shape metal. It was way more widely used before modern welding technology. So that makes sense. So I'm like, oh. So they actually believe that the pumpernickel loaf,
Brandon (01:00:22.924)
Hahaha
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:00:48.174)
to they believe it was the murder weapon because it actually perfectly matched the indentation found on the skull of Reginald. And it was found right by him. So they were like, Reginald has been murdered by quite hard, which by the way, I don't know if you guys realize, but if you leave a loaf of bread out for way too long, it gets very hard. And it's because like the...
Brandon (01:00:57.786)
How hard was this loaf of bread?
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:01:15.234)
the moisture is drawn out of it, and so it just hardens in general. So it can get pretty hard.
Anna Howard (01:01:18.909)
Okay, wait. I was about to say, why don't we just use bread as bricks then, but then that makes sense that if it rained, then it would just become bread again. So we can't do that.
Brandon (01:01:27.002)
Ha ha
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:01:27.47)
It would become bread against like a sponge. The house is like, boo. And my house melted.
Brandon (01:01:32.934)
Right. Why's my house smell so moldy?
Anna Howard (01:01:35.236)
Ew. Soggy bread.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:01:39.306)
Ew. But it's interesting because you know, within a bag, like if your bread is in a bag on the counter, it doesn't really harden, it gets moldy because the moisture just like draws out and then yeah, just creates, hello, all that mold. So if it's out, like not in something in open air, then it will get hard. Which I feel is weirdly sexual to say. That felt weird for a second. Okay, anyway. So they are not sure if the loaf, I know.
Brandon (01:01:41.626)
Chris.
Brandon (01:01:55.757)
Yeah.
Brandon (01:02:06.41)
Of course he would take it there.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:02:08.686)
They're not sure if the pumpernickel bread that killed Reginald, Reginald Hemsley Doddingdale, they're not sure that if it was baked to be extra firm in consistency with the intent of murder, if it was just that and then it was grabbed and he was beaten. Yeah, I mean, it can happen. So interestingly enough about this story, that's it. That's all the information. It remains completely unsolved. Poor Reginald with his-
Brandon (01:02:22.554)
premeditated bread making.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:02:37.534)
indentation on his skull from pumpernickel bread.
Anna Howard (01:02:39.177)
Wait, so where did you say that he was found? Cause like, I almost feel like if he was like on the street or something, then what if somebody just like accidentally a piece of bread fell out of their window?
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:02:43.622)
No clue. He was just known.
Brandon (01:02:53.386)
or drive by pumpernickeling.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:02:58.55)
I influe and hit him in the back of the head. I know. Yeah, and it's like, actually we don't know. I know, I'm like, can I find something? I even, I looked everywhere and I'm like, I cannot find any information on Reginald's case, even from the Scottish, the Scotland Yard. It was in 1988, so it was a little bit ago, clearly. But there's just, I'm like, was he a baker? Did he own a bakery? And I like.
Anna Howard (01:02:59.433)
And it's like a brick hitting you.
Brandon (01:03:02.894)
somebody threw it from their house cause they're like, this bread's too hard. Donk. Ha ha ha.
Anna Howard (01:03:06.853)
Yeah, yeah, they're like throwing it out.
Brandon (01:03:23.438)
But 1988 wasn't that long ago, right? Like...
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:03:28.31)
Was he out on a farm? Like I just, it's so.
Anna Howard (01:03:28.342)
Yeah.
Brandon (01:03:31.106)
Like even though you said what year it was, my head is like thinking of like, this was a long time ago on cobblestone streets and people were walking cause there was no cars. Like.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:03:36.854)
Like in the 1800s? I know, I know. It's exactly how I'm envisioning it as well. And yeah, it was in the 80s. I know, pumpernickeling. Worst case of pumpernickeling I've seen. Oh, how many cases have you seen? So speaking of which, Reginald is not the only chap in history to have been killed by pred in 1801.
Brandon (01:03:46.03)
the pumpernickeling. That's crazy.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:04:03.678)
another Welshman named William Hopkin was also killed by a loaf of bread in apparently or not in apparently a loaf of bread period. Apparently a laborer by the name of Morgan Hopkin threw a loaf of bread at William and he died a few years later. So the coroner actually stated that the bread throne delivered a mortal blow upon his private parts, which is what led to his murder.
Brandon (01:04:31.29)
I wasn't expecting that part.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:04:33.038)
Me neither. So there have been other reports of people trying to murder even like back in 2017 in a grocery store with bread, but it wasn't successful because they weren't hard, as hard as an anvil. So that's my friends.
Anna Howard (01:04:47.209)
Wait, this episode is reminding me of a show called Dead Like Me. Either of you ever seen that?
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:04:55.818)
Yes, dead like, it was like on HBO or Showtime or something, right? Yeah.
Anna Howard (01:04:58.473)
Yeah, and it's about the first episode, a flying scrap of a toilet seat from space. Like something like blows up, it kills the main girl. Something blows up in space and like hurdles down to this girl who's in Manhattan standing there. And it's a piece of a toilet seat that like hits her on the side of the head and she dies. And then she becomes a reaper that like takes the soul of other people.
Brandon (01:04:59.472)
Yes.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:05:09.102)
Yeah, because it feels like the main girl, right?
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:05:20.738)
from like the space station or something, right? Yes, such a good show. Although the little like creepy devil or like goblin things or whatever that she has to like get to them first, right? Like the Reaper has to go and like save the soul for it. Yeah, that show was great actually. It was really well done. Yeah, that's hilarious that it reminds you of that. I guess the...
Brandon (01:05:21.014)
I totally forgot about that.
Anna Howard (01:05:27.245)
Such a good show. You should definitely watch it if you can find it on streaming services.
Anna Howard (01:05:37.364)
Yeah.
Brandon (01:05:37.498)
They're like the black shadows.
Anna Howard (01:05:39.805)
Yeah, it's such a good show.
Brandon (01:05:41.45)
It was good.
Anna Howard (01:05:46.085)
I was just like, this is kind of, because my theory is that it was just, I mean, I don't know, an accident, like something.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:05:53.938)
Or it wasn't or like, was he carrying the pumpernickel bread? And like somebody was like, boom.
Anna Howard (01:05:57.365)
Yeah, I don't know. I'm literally picturing it falling out of the sky and hitting him and he's just like dead.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:06:03.638)
The pumpernickelloaf came from the space station and came hurling down. And now he's a reaper, I don't know. That's hilarious. Yeah, I found that to be so incredibly funny, which is not funny, but I found this article that was like weird or unusual murder weapons. And this one that was like pumpernickelbred, not only that, but his name killed me. Like Sir Reginald Hemsley Doddingdale.
Brandon (01:06:04.107)
All right.
It could have.
Anna Howard (01:06:08.065)
Yeah.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:06:33.514)
It's so British and it's so fun. Poor thing, died from a pumpernickel beating. But like also, like was he hit once? Oh, done. I don't know. Like it's just, I guess. I mean, if anybody out there has any information on this one, cause I couldn't find it, let us know because I'm interested to see what else they discovered in.
Brandon (01:06:35.03)
It is so British.
Anna Howard (01:06:35.403)
amazing.
Brandon (01:06:40.954)
That's so sad.
Brandon (01:06:46.306)
Well, if it's like an anvil, probably. With some hard ass bread.
Anna Howard (01:06:46.389)
Yeah, we don't know anything.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:07:01.474)
their investigation other than, you know, this, this police officer quoting, using his quote or whatever, which I can't find now in my notes. So there's that. Anyway, that one, that's that. So Brandon's was pretty meaty. Mine was, I like bro Brandon and I was like, mine's really short. So I'm just gonna expand on a couple of things like pumpernickel bread history.
Brandon (01:07:20.15)
there you go.
Brandon (01:07:27.415)
No, but it was a little bit more lighthearted, which is nice to have thrown in there too, because mine was not. So it was a nice way to wrap up the episode. Because at first I thought mine would be a little bit more lighthearted, but then it wasn't. I mean, not, I mean, we're talking about murder, it's not going to be lighthearted, but I thought it would be a different, I thought it was going to be more like yours where it was a little bit less agonizing to go through, but it was still a great story.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:07:32.814)
true.
Anna Howard (01:07:35.443)
Yeah.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:07:37.17)
I know. Then we should do this one again.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:07:43.125)
No.
It's never lighthearted, but...
Anna Howard (01:07:53.754)
Yeah.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:07:56.31)
Well, I'm, I feel like, um, mine is a little bit satirical. Like it's just, it's very much like this headline killed by pumpernickel bread. It just like, I don't like, how can that not be like, no, or like at all. Thank you. Yeah. But pumpernickel, pumpernickel bread, like I just.
Anna Howard (01:08:05.559)
Right.
Brandon (01:08:07.626)
I would like to not be killed by pumpernickel bread, please. Or any other bread of that sort, whether that's being beaten with it or choking on it.
Anna Howard (01:08:17.621)
Yeah, when you said pumpernickel Brad, my first thought was did somebody poison this guy? Like I thought maybe they just put something in the Brad, but this is much more of a mystery than that.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:08:26.274)
This is lonely. But also like, did they keep that loaf of bread for evidence? And isn't like sitting in some evidence locker right now, just this loaf of fucking pumpernickel bread? Maybe.
Brandon (01:08:36.899)
You never know.
Anna Howard (01:08:37.373)
it'll be really moldy and smelly if it is.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:08:40.318)
I know, but like was there blood on the bread? Was there, like I just, I'm like, I have so many questions. So many questions that are unanswered, so.
Anna Howard (01:08:43.213)
There must have been.
Brandon (01:08:47.551)
Right? Like, was there anything else? Like, was it only being hit by bread?
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:08:53.326)
What's that? I mean, apparently, and I just envisioned them like in the coroner's office with this bread and being like, yeah, matches the indent. Like I just, like, I don't know. It shouldn't be funny, but it's funny. So yeah, that is my story of Reginald. That's why I said Reginald. You know, like, he didn't even know it hit him, this pumpernickel bread.
Brandon (01:09:02.383)
I'm gonna go to bed.
Anna Howard (01:09:06.054)
Oh my god.
Anna Howard (01:09:18.201)
Oh, Reginald.
Brandon (01:09:18.478)
Oh, rest.
Anna Howard (01:09:22.721)
Poor guy.
Brandon (01:09:22.874)
I mean, he might not have ever hit him in the back of the head. He might not have expected it to happen.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:09:25.006)
Poor thing. I know. Well, and it's the articles that I found, literally the Sarasota Herald Tribune opinion section. Like, why was it there? And like a couple of other, like, yeah, I mean, I think so. The Sarasota Herald Tribune, I mean, that's.
Brandon (01:09:36.514)
Right, is it, you mean Sarasota, Florida? Was it the Saras, because that's a-
Anna Howard (01:09:36.849)
Yeah, the opinion section.
Brandon (01:09:44.982)
Is there a Sarasota in the UK?
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:09:48.138)
Maybe, I don't know. I guess there could be. It didn't seem like it was written in like English from UK, but you know, the quote was very much English for sure. But that one, I don't know. Anyway, so episode 12 y'all, Bizarre Murder Weapons, toilet seat, was it a toilet seat lid? Like the porcelain, oh my God.
Brandon (01:09:54.518)
doesn't sound like a... no.
Brandon (01:10:09.026)
Yeah, well, they were definitely it was definitely bizarre. It was the toilet seat tank lid. So the top of it.
Anna Howard (01:10:10.343)
Boo!
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:10:17.494)
That shit's heavy. Wow. That's horrible. So toilet seat lid and a vertical bridge.
Brandon (01:10:20.644)
Yeah.
Brandon (01:10:28.058)
There you have it. Yeah, and Chainsaur will probably do a couple more of these ones because there's quite a few bizarre murder weapons.
Anna Howard (01:10:28.53)
Insane.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:10:28.918)
Very different murder weapons. Yeah. Anyway.
Anna Howard (01:10:34.773)
But both of them were bashing their head in, just with different things.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:10:34.85)
There were a few bizarre ones.
Mm-hmm. That's true. How did we do that again, Bran? Hmm. I was gonna choose another one, but then I was like, oh, it's intense. Even miles apart. Crazy. All right, well, exciting. So, friends, thank you for joining us on this adventure. But again, remember, yeah.
Brandon (01:10:42.443)
I don't know.
We're just so in tune with each other.
Anna Howard (01:10:48.444)
Hehehe
Anna Howard (01:11:01.536)
I'm gonna go.
Brandon (01:11:01.93)
Right? Be careful of flying pumpernickel.
Anna Howard (01:11:06.358)
Yeah.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:11:06.474)
Yes, please watch out for flying pumpernickel that feels like an anvil. Yeah, just ask the roadrunner. Um, all right.
Brandon (01:11:11.191)
You never know when it's gonna hit you.
Brandon (01:11:17.201)
the
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:11:18.754)
Guys, if you have any hometown murders, again, please email them to us at murd Please go visit our website as well. And if you would please subscribe on YouTube and also follow us right in review. And just have a lovely day and don't get murdered.
Good advice. Yeah, there we go. Anna Brandon, thank you for joining on this amazing journey of Homicide the Podcast. Yeah, I'm gonna go. That's it. Have a great day.
Brandon (01:11:41.39)
period.
Anna Howard (01:11:42.037)
Don't get murdered.
Anna Howard (01:11:48.417)
Thank you.
Brandon (01:11:49.206)
It was a good one.
Anna Howard (01:11:55.997)
Oh, okay. I'm gonna go. You know what, I'm gonna go.
Brandon (01:11:57.548)
Okay, goodbye.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:12:01.842)
Any parting messages? This was done. And I'm gonna go. Any last arguments from you?
Brandon (01:12:01.866)
Right? And imagine if his camera just like went dark at that time. His mic cuts out.
Anna Howard (01:12:05.694)
and I'm gonna go.
Brandon (01:12:14.574)
Arguments like this is a court
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:12:15.838)
I could end it like I end all client meetings. Any comments, questions or concerns?
Anna Howard (01:12:22.441)
I'm concerned that now when I walk outside of my apartment, I'm gonna get killed by a piece of pumpernickel bread.
Brandon (01:12:22.678)
Not from me.
Brandon (01:12:27.83)
All right.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:12:28.582)
Yep, yep, yep. I agree, I'm gonna look out for those flying pumpernickels. What, wait, what was that one word? Pumpernickeled? What did he call it? That police officer? Why can I not find this quote in my own notes? My Lord. Did I delete it? Oh, here. Pumpernickeling. So friends, don't go pumpernickeling anyone.
Anna Howard (01:12:40.461)
pumper-nickeled and dimed.
Anna Howard (01:12:55.241)
Wait, okay, so I looked up Reginald and Pumpernickel and I just clicked on the first article that came up and I just started scrolling. And one piece of this article, I don't think it has anything to do with this Reginald guy, but it just says, "'You're not just seeing things.' You're dying."
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:13:02.347)
Yeah.
Anna Howard (01:13:15.509)
And then it says, when approaching death, a person's brain starts to shut down in certain areas to focus on only the most necessary functions, much in the same way as the rest of the body. It's like talking about how people start to hallucinate. So if you start to hallucinate, you might be dying. And with that.
Brandon (01:13:16.278)
I'm sorry.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:13:29.718)
You could be dying. Yeah, so. That was Anna's parting message. Thank you for that encouragement. Oh my God, that's horrible. Wow, and on that note, today's takeaways. Don't, if you're hallucinating, you may be dead. Be careful of pumpernickeling. And stay away from pizza guys named Joe. I don't know.
Brandon (01:13:30.519)
Oh my gosh.
Brandon (01:13:35.426)
Have a great day. Enjoy the rest of your Tuesday if you're listening on the day it's sent out.
Anna Howard (01:13:36.564)
Yeah, you're welcome everybody.
Anna Howard (01:13:52.845)
You may be dead.
Brandon (01:13:58.903)
Yeah, maybe.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:14:00.206)
Is that the other one? Or maybe don't play with toilet lids? God.
Brandon (01:14:08.476)
glue down your lid.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:14:10.338)
Go down your way.
Anna Howard (01:14:11.002)
I would say maybe just like don't invite your drug dealer pizza guy to your home ever.
Brandon (01:14:11.685)
Just kidding.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:14:21.13)
Yeah, I would agree with that sentiment. Also, weed is like medically legal in a lot of places slash, you know, recreationally in some places. So I don't know, just go buy your weed from a store.
Brandon (01:14:24.323)
to know.
Anna Howard (01:14:34.389)
YAH
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:14:34.894)
I don't know. Yeah. All right. Well, there we go. So, everybody have a great day. Ooh, there's the church bells. And on that note, Jesus loves you so much. Goodbye.
Anna Howard (01:14:42.813)
Yeah, signing off.
Anna Howard (01:14:49.032)
Bye.
Anna Howard (01:14:53.4)
Okay.
Kevin Tydlaska-Dziedzic (01:14:53.668)
Alright.